Thursday, 24 December 2009

  • Christmas 2009...

    Doesn't really feel like Christmas and Adobe Flash can go and die.

    I'm worried that i might have made a big big big mistake. I feel like I should do something about it but I don't know how to and results from my previous efforts have left me rather unmotivated to try again so i just avoid everything and then feel like a tonne of shit. I'm quite sure i can do this for the longest time but I'm not sure i want to. If i should choose the alternative, i would be walking away from alot of things that I have gotten used to.

    Therefore my conclusion is that i need to find this Someone. Not like a boyfriend. Maybe an old fashioned pen pal from some far off country. Someone who is just like me. Someone i can talk to without any judgement. Someone who has his or her own pile of shit to deal with and needs someone to talk to. Like Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray in Lost in Translation.

    If you have an inkling as to where to find this someone, let me know asap.

Friday, 18 December 2009

  • fireflies

    "i like to make myself believe
    that planet earth turns slowly
    its hard to say i'd rather stay awake when i'm asleep
    cuz everything is never as it seems"


    Christmas gathering on the 23rd at Amelia's. Its pot luck!

Wednesday, 16 December 2009

  • Day 2 of my flash assignment

    I am an emotional eater.

    I eat when i'm upset, i eat when i'm happy, i eat when my period is here and i'm currently stuffing my face.

    and i hate the situation i'm in and i hate that there is nothing i can do about it.

    Worst of all, i hate that i'm allowing myself to wallow in self pity and mope around considering the amount of projects fighting for attention.

    I think I won't be able to complete this flash assignment within 5 days seeing how nothing is really animated yet.

Tuesday, 15 December 2009

Sunday, 13 December 2009

  • Today i hit rock bottom.
    Its the worst i ever felt in the last three years. And i don't know if i can live the rest of my life hoping that things will get better.

Tuesday, 08 December 2009

  • what break?

    It is only the 8th of december but i am almost done with presents.

    I know i'm damn kan chiong but this three week break is not a break. I have giant assignments to complete and on top of that, i have to do my shifts at Orchard Central at the OCBC booth. Its a job I love and hate. I love the salary and i hate everything else. I'd like to share a secret here but internship has taught me that some companies have sophisticated software that can track down every single internet page that mentions their name and i don't wanna find out the hard way if OCBC is one of them.

    Anyway...

    A few days ago, i had this giant bout of depression when i realised that i have less than 10 weeks in polytechnic. Then i'll graduate and then its a big question mark. What to do next? Applying for university seem logical and then wait out the 7 month break and figure out what to do with the rest of my life. And what if i can't get into a good university? thats a whole new problem.

    I've been feeling find of lost lately and would love a drink or two. Or 20. but i don't have time for that.

    I hope i bring good news tomorrow.

    BTW, its scary how people bug me to open a facebook account. Sometimes i do consider doing so but then i've met some people who are just so fucking addicted to facebook games.

    It scares me.

Thursday, 03 December 2009

Friday, 27 November 2009

Thursday, 19 November 2009